What can I do to increase my sex appeal?

I sometimes feel as if I am not attractive enough to have sex. What can I do to increase my sex appeal?

The best way to increase your sex appeal is by improving your own body image. When you feel good about yourself, things like sexual appeal and feeling “good enough” for a partner will follow. Here are a few tips to help you improve your body image:


•   Don't measure your self-worth by your physical appearance. Your self-esteem should come from more important aspects of yourself, such as your creativity, determination, values, intelligence and so on. Consider doing activities that make you feel good about yourself, like joining a fun fitness class, picking up a hobby, or volunteering.

•   Accept compliments. Do not dismiss a compliment as someone just trying to be nice. Instead, try to savor the compliment and allow yourself the satisfaction of knowing you deserve admiration. If you believe and accept the compliments people are giving you, you’ll start to feel better about yourself, and feel good enough for romantic partners.

•   Understand that magazines, popular television shows, and movies primarily show unrealistic (oftentimes completely fake) depictions of men and women. If you consciously recognize that these are idealized images, your subconscious will avoid picking up the message, 'this is what I should look like.'

•   Avoid focusing on your perceived flaws.  Make a list of all the things you love about your body and have a close friend to make a similar list about you. You may find some of the things you believed were flaws are cherished and admired by others.

•   Stop "fat talk" and self-deprecation. This is when a person says a self-destructive thought out loud in the hopes that someone will contradict them. If this is something you regularly engage in, after a while you will begin to perceive your own hurtful comments as true.

•   Start a moderate exercise routine and good diet. This will make you feel healthy and increase your self-esteem. Do not exercise or diet only for the purpose of weight loss, you may just get discouraged and quit. Also, do not exercise too much. One hour of exercise each day should provide a healthy workout. Avoid use of diet or muscle-building pills, weight loss herbs/foods and steroids. Steroids are dangerous to the body, and may lead to dependency, acne, gynecomastia (enlarged breasts), baldness, aggression (commonly known as “‘roid rage”), high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease and jaundice.


Hopefully these tips will help you improve your own body image. If you are interested in improving your own sex appeal because you feel others are not interested in you, it is important to first feel good about yourself, because you are deserving of a caring and respectful partner in your life. Your body is a beautiful, wonderful thing just the way it is, and you deserve to feel good about it.